What is my counselling approach?
I believe everyone should have access to counselling – regardless of ability, age, income or class. I don’t just Listen to what you say – I hear you! Counselling is also about hearing what you don’t say by using empathy to really try and understand you.
As Alfred Adler, (who founded individual psychology) put it: ‘Empathy is seeing with the eyes of another, listening with the ears of another and feeling with the heart of another.’
What motivated me to become a counsellor?
In 2012, while I was in my first term at University, my Dad died. I contacted a bereavement charity to ask for counselling and was told nobody was available. There was no empathy, no “Try such-and such a charity” or “Try calling in six weeks.” I was offered four sessions through University and they really helped – but I still felt incredibly lost and alone.
My guide dog, Chelsea, was my constant companion. She put her head on my knee one day when I was having a panic attack because I couldn’t cope with all the feelings running round in my brain. She was my silent friend who sat with me, rather than ignoring my distress or avoiding me.
I moved to a totally different place and although I enjoyed my new job, that feeling of being metaphorically and psychologically lost was still with me. Three years ago Chelsea died and I found it really difficult to manage the feelings of loss and grief I experienced. I enrolled on an introduction to counselling course through my local University and loved it. I really enjoyed it and decided to do a post-grad course to become fully qualified.
When training as a counsellor, you almost have to unlearn who you thought you were. I finally understood “why” I said, did and thought certain things – and the best thing was that I didn’t have to accept that was my only option. I could change the way I think and behave – and so can you!
Another motivation to set up my own practice was the amount of people who are on waiting lists for the NHS and charities.
If you need support because you’ve lost your job, are grieving, or have been diagnosed with an illness or disability you need that support straight away!
Everyone needs support at some time in their lives and It’s OK to reach out for help.